Empathy Through Vulnerability
“If you hear the voice of God, harden not your hearts.”
Most of you know at this point that I am the youngest of 12 children.
Often my parents got asked the question
“Which of your children do you love the most?”
When I was around when this was asked,
I would stand up, being the youngest
I was sure to expect my name would be the answer.
But what they would answer, my father would say it
“Whichever one needs it the most.”
That is really profound wisdom.
Every parent wants to love all their children
but whoever needs it the most at that time is who they give it to.
Let me give you an example of what that meant for my father and me.
When I was about 15 or 16 years old, I actually fractured my back.
The doctors did not realize it at the time and
just told me to go home and spend two weeks in bed.
My father, at the end of every day, would come down to my room
and he would spend an hour plus time with me.
To get that much time with my dad was extraordinary.
He did not tell me how silly I was to hurt myself playing rugby.
He did not scold me about doing silly things, which I am sure I did.
And he did not say
“Oh, it’s all going to be all right.
Just get up and walk; you’ll be fine.”
He didn’t. He just sat with me.
He would tell stories about when he was hurt; when he was a young boy.
He talked about once, when he was younger,
and he had an accident on the tractor.
I remember sharing it at his funeral
and none of my brothers and sisters knew anything about those stories. Because they didn’t have that same time when I had been sick.
He didn’t take any pain away
but I had somebody with me in my pain.
Now my mother did the same thing in a different way.
But my point is this is what we call empathy.
And empathy cannot be faked.
It requires of the person giving it to be vulnerable;
to stand with the other person and not make it about them.
It is to stand with the other person and just be present to them.
That is empathy.
And it requires vulnerability.
And we can sense it.
We know when somebody is with us with true vulnerability.
Today in our climate right now,
the frontline workers who are tending to the COVID patients
in hospitals throughout the country and throughout the world,
they are standing with them.
They are making themselves vulnerable to serve those COVID patients.
And even though they sometimes cannot do anything about their suffering,
they stand with them and are with them.
That is empathy.
Today, we are beginning Catholic Schools Week.
Catholic school teachers and administrators
have done a very similar thing.
They have stood on the side of children and their families
and have shown up in the school.
They have come to the school and gone to great lengths
to make things happen so that the school could open
when they are allowed to with the restrictions.
The children have been able to continue to learn
whether at home with distance learning
or whether in person when allowed;
and the difference it makes for those children is huge.
But those teachers and administrators had to stand with them.
They had to make themselves vulnerable to do that.
It is that sense of empathy that is the cornerstone
of Jesus’ ministry and our discipleship.
We are called to stand with those who are most in need.
Today’s gospel comes from Mark;
it is actually the very beginning of Mark’s gospel
and the beginning of Jesus’ ministry.
And this is his first miracle.
It is extraordinary what he does.
Jesus goes into Capernaum into the Synagogue,
which of course is the center of religious authority.
And what does Jesus do?
He stands with the one who is most vulnerable.
He stands with the one who is most in need.
They said he was possessed by demons;
today we might just say that he was sick;
we wouldn’t necessarily use those terms
but it was a cover-all to cover a multitude of sickness.
And what Jesus does is he calls out that demon.
Even the demon knew who Jesus was
because it was so evident to those who wanted to know;
and clearly the religious leaders did not want to know.
They did not want to disturb the status quo.
But Jesus comes, and this is consistent throughout the gospels,
Jesus always comes and stands with the wounded;
the broken; those in need and those who are what we call sinners.
The widows, the children, all those who are considered to be in need.
That is a model for us as disciples;
that we are called to stand with those who are most in need.
Pope Francis has said this over and over again
that we need to be a church who stands with those most in need.
He calls it “Going out to the existential peripheries”
where people are most in need.
We are called to be a field hospital
that we reach out to those who are wounded and hurt.
And that is what we are called to do as disciples.
Today, we celebrate the Annual Diocesan Pledge Sunday.
I know that is a strange term to use “celebrate”
but in fact we do celebrate.
Yes, we have been doing it as a Diocese, as a local Church, for 40 years;
although we here at St. Simon’s have been doing it
for 65 years as a parish because we were with the archdiocese before that.
But in doing so in the 40 years,
this Diocese has been journeying together
with those who are most in need
whether they are inside our own community here at St. Simon’s
or throughout the different other communities
in the 54 communities of the Diocese of San Jose.
We have journeyed together and that is something worth celebrating.
But what we do today at the community of St. Simon’s;
and we are asking people throughout the whole Diocese
but at St. Simon’s we are asking people to make a pledge to stand
with those who are most in need.
Now, what that means for us is that a pledge is a financial pledge
but it is more than just a financial pledge,
I want you to listen to their stories;
read the material that we sent to you;
go on line and watch the videos that
tell the stories of who we are and
why it is important to stand with those most in need.
The Diocese, the Chancery the head office
where I have worked for the last 12 years as well,
does the work of the central office.
It helps all the parishes and schools to be who they are.
And we would have been lost without them during this pandemic
because they did so much of the interpretation of the many changing rules
at the Federal, State, or County level as rules that keep on changing.
And that is what we journeyed together in.
When we make a pledge, we support the Diocese
but we support what all the other parishes do and the work that they do.
This year, in a special way,
one of our parishioners has given a $50,000 matching gift
so that everything over our goal of $213,000,
will be matched dollar-for-dollar up to $50,000
and it is to go to those who are most in need;
those who are in need of rental assistance.
We have chosen to partner with St. Mary’s in Gilroy
and Christ the King on the Eastside.
Both those parishes have had a devastated affect from the pandemic.
Up to 40% of their people have lost their jobs
and they are in fear of losing their homes.
The idea is that we would try to match this $50,000
to be able to give to those families $100,000 in rental assistance
over this next year so they could stay in their home;
so they can stay where they are at and
hopefully return to employment when we get through this pandemic.
What we do today is make ourselves vulnerable.
It means we have to listen to their stories and enter into their story.
And then we are meant to open up our hearts;
and of course then we are asked to make a pledge,
which of course means we have to open up our wallet to;
and if you are able to do that, we ask you to do that.
But at the very least, the very least, to open up your heart
to the stories of those who have been devastated
by this pandemic last year.
Our discipleship is not just about coming to Church;
it is about being Church.
It is about being the family of God.
And when we are family, we make decisions as a family
and we stand with each other through thick and through thin.
Today, I ask you to make that pledge for the Annual Diocesan Appeal
and to help those who are most in need at this time.
And that in all we do, that we stand with those who are most in need.
And we thank you for your gift.
“If you hear the voice of God, harden not your hearts.”